Ducks are everywhere which means there is always an opportunity to bust out a good duck pun! Did you know ducks have three eyelids? Two regular ones and a third transparent one that keeps their eyes moist while they swim. Here are our best duck jokes, and if you have any funny ones to add, leave a comment below!
- Why do spiders like ducks? They like their webbed feet.
- What did the cow and duck name their new rock band? Cheese and quackers.
- Why did the duck need his window fixed? There was a quack in it.
- What point of a view does a duck write a book in? Bird person.
- Why does a duck have feathers? To cover up its buttquack.
- What news did the duck get from the doctor? He had a perfect bill of health
- Where do ducks go to search for jokes? The world wide webbed feet.
- How do ducks propose? With a wedding wing.
- What do you call a kind and successful duck? A waddle citizen.
- What do you call a crate that’s filled with a bunch of ducks? A box of quackers.
- What do ducks carry their school books in? Quack-packs.
- What’s a duck’s favorite fantasy movie? Lord of the Wings.
- Where do ducks live? Bill-dings.
- What do you get if you cross a duck and Santa Claus? A Christmas quacker.
- Why did the duck get a red card in the football game? For fowl play.
- Why do ducks like campfires? They love seeing them quackle at night.
- What time do ducks get up? The quack of dawn.
- Why do ducks fly south for the winter? It’s too far to waddle.
- What do you call it when a group of mallards is making too much noise? Quackophany.
- What do you call it when it’s raining chickens and ducks? Fowl weather.
- How do you know if a duck is scared? He’s quacking in his boots.
- Why was the duck put into the basketball game? To make a fowl shot.
- Most ducks live in what state? Duckota.
- What do you call a ghost duck? A poultrygeist.
- A duck walks into the pharmacy to purchase chapstick. And asks the cashier to put it on his bill.
- A scientist wanted the day to go faster, so he tied a clock to a duck. Time flew for a moment.
- A duck saved all its money in a bowl made of sticks. It had a nest egg.
- Ducks are the best tour guides. They’ve always got a bird’s eye view.
- Ducks watch the news each day to find out the feather forecast.
- Why did the duckling almost fall on the sidewalk? She tripped on a quack.
- What kind of egg does an optimistic duckling hatch from? Sunny side up.
- Why did the duck get a second job? He had too many bills.
- What do ducks use to fix things around their house? Duck tape.
- Why did the duck cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
- Where did the duck go when he was sick? To the ducktor.
- On what side does a duck have the most feathers? The outside.
- What do you call a duck that’s biting someone? Peking Duck.
- What do you call a duck that breaks into people’s houses? A robber duck.
- What is a duck’s favorite sea monster? The quacken.
- Why did the duck get detention? He couldn’t stop quackin’ jokes in class.
- What should a duck wear to a fancy event? A duck-sedo.
- What do you call a clever duck? A wise quacker.
- What game did the duck play at the arcade? Quack-a-mole
- Why did the duck go to the chiropractor? To get it’s back quacked.
- It’s really easy to surprise a duck, they’re often caught flat footed.
- The ducks weren’t happy when the council banned feeding them. There were a lot of angry birds.
- A duck and a tropical bird were playing on the computer. The duck lost. Toucan play that game.
- Did the duck couple make plans for their night out? No, they decided to wing it.
- Did you hear about the duck that swam into sewage? He smelled fowl.
- What do you get if you mix ducks with fireworks? Firequackers.
- What has fangs and webbed feet? Count Duckula.
- What’s a duck do when he hears a joke he likes? He quacks up.
- Where do tough ducks come from? Hard-boiled eggs.
If duck jokes are your thing you will probably love our frog jokes, beaver jokes, and llama jokes too. Or head back to the animal jokes page to browse the full collection.
